Sugar & Spice

I have one of the most frivolous mothers in the world! It’s very contradictory, …she’s strong, impulsive, decided, real, traditional and very down to earth; qualities that I don’t tend to match with lipstick and shoes or coordinating clothes with nail polish. I love her, even when I don’t understand her.

On the weekend a small argument took place while we were shopping:

“What do you want for Christmas?” - mom

“I don’t know. Whatever you want to give me.” - me

“Whatevers are not allowed. Tell me. This is hard for me.” - mom

“Hard?! I’m super easy mom!” - me

“No, you and your sisters are super difficult. Maybe, if you were more fashionable, it would be easier for me. It’s frustrating!” - mom

“I dress fashionable sometimes!” - me

“Yeah! When you were younger I had to literally bribe you. Now I can only beg you and prey to God. Same with your sisters.” - mom

“Well mom, you have to deal with that. You can’t have everything you want right?!” -me

“I know and it’s all my fault… I’m paying for it now.” - mom

“COME-ON! Paying for what?! What are you talking about?!” - me

“You know how I feel every time I go shopping and see something I like for you girls but then I think you might not like it. You only wear jeans, flats or tennis shoes, and… well least you wear nice shirts for Christ sake! You should start dressing like someone who is about to become a doctor!” - mom

“Mom what a tragedy!!! I wear nice jeans, Coach or Lacoste tennis shoes, cute flats. What the hell are you talking about!?!? I’m clueless about this tantrum.” - me

“When you were kids I should have been one of those mother that MADE their kids wear cute pink dresses but since I wanted you guys to be free and happy I didn’t. I should have been one of those moms that say “you going to wear it and you won’t get it dirty!!”.” - mom

“Are you joking? You are joking right?” - me

“I am not joking. You don’t understand.” - mom

“OH-MY-GOD. I mean, mom what the hell!? You want to talk about making us do something?! You made us respectful people, with good values, morals, integrity. You gave us education, great education! You should be jumping around saying that you have great kids because we are. I mean, there is people out there suffering because their kids are out in the streets doing gods know what and you are here ranting because according to you, your daughters don’t dress fashionable enough. SERIOUSLY?!?!” - me

“…” - mom

“My GOD mom, you are unbelievable!!” - me

“Not even make-up!!” - mom

“What?! I like make up. Just because I don’t own or wear hundreds of lipsticks doesn’t mean I don’t like it. We all get manicures and pedicure together. You, Nana, Sama and Me! What are you talking about!!!” - me

“Well, that’s true.” - mom

“Of course it’s true. We are shopping mom. How more girly can it get?!” - me

“You’re right!!! I love you girls so much, and Stav (my bro) too. I’m so proud of all of you.” - mom

…contradictory, ridiculously funny and adorable. That’s my mom.

I’ll leave you guys with one of my mom’s lectures:

“J… it doesn’t matter what you do, NEVER underestimate the importance of having clean cute feet. Nothing worst than a woman with dirty and ugly feet.”

Love you mom!

I’ve been feeling bummed, beating myself with frustration over things I have absolute no control of and can’t change as I please. My emotional biorhythm is in -85. I’ve always thought that the best way to ventilate emotions is by writing them out and giving them some sense of form; so when a close friend tagged me on a “15 things I hate about you” Facebook note, it felt suiting for me to do a “things I hate about myself list” and this is what came out.

10 things I hate about myself:

1. How sometimes I just can’t let go.
2. How much I fear.
3. How easy it is for me to alienate.
4. How smart I am over my feelings and how frequently they run over my intelligence.
5. How shy I can get.
6. How I can never manage to control my horrible sleeping habits.
7. How much I over-analyze the simple.
8. How conflict-avoiding I am (sometimes you need conflict to build character).
9. How fast I forget what matters, and how easily I can remember every small little detail.
10. How unreasonably self-conscious I can get without a motive under perfectly normal circumstances.

It became apparent to me that, although it usually takes me some time to do listings, I could specifically figure this one out in a matter of a stupidly fast 15 minutes. I thought “No. This is unacceptable”, and decided to do something to null it. That’s how I came up with “things I love about myself” counterpart:

10 things I love about myself:

1. How conflict-avoiding I am (hey, it tends to keep me in good terms with the world).
2. How I don’t rely on others’ opinion to do something.
3. How I can never stay angry.
4. How excited I can get over small things.
5. How I can step out of the norm.
6. How I don’t strive for attention, but neither allow myself to be taken for granted.
7. How my hair always seems to fall into place, no matter what.
8. How I’ve manage to overcome stuff that didn’t please me.
9. How determined I can be whenever I say “enough”.
10. How blessed I am for the family that I have.

Now, make your own list Besos.

I performed my very first suture on a living human being today!!!
It was amazing. I felt adrenaline flowing through my veins.
I was extremely nervous but my teacher guided me though it and it all went well.

In other news I have a massive headache and I have to study for a big test that I have tomorrow. Not a good combination. I’ll probably get some rest now and study during the night. Less distractions.

I was offered a job as a tutor and the pay is good. I used to tutor school kids in college and I really enjoyed it but I don’t have the time right now. I could definitely use the money but I’m not sure. I need all my brains in this thing that I’m doing right now.

I found this website the other day called Awkward Family Photos; you should really take a look. Very funny and very Awkward.

Well, I’m off to rest a bit so I can hit the books later.
Hope you all had a great day.
Besos,
S&S

Last night like so many other nights, I just couldn’t sleep…
Thinking of what to do I went through all my books and notebooks hoping I was going to find something to do but instead I found this:

English Translations to that would be:
“I love you more than anything in this world.
Never stop believing in yourself.
Love you.
Adriana”

Adriana is my 15 yr. old sister and she is just the most amazing person you will ever get to meet in your life. Her words are quiet and short but behind that silence there is so much to be said. She’s naive but so mature at the same time; so loyal, so selfless, so compassionate. If you are lucky enough you will have the privilege of looking at the most amazing pair of eyes you will see in your life. She’s worth more than she or anyone could imagine and it just take one look into her eyes to see her transparency and good vibes. This world would be a much much much better world if there were more Adrianas. I can bet my life on it.

Thank you A for always being there for me. It’s because of you that everyday I want to be a better person. I want you to be proud of me just as I am proud of you.

Learn, laugh, take risks, love; but never ever stop being the little ray of sunshine that you are. That’s what makes you so special. You should know that by now.

Luv You Too Sis.

See you guys tonight.
Have a great day!!!
Besos;
S&S